Wait For It
[28b bottom] R’ Yochanan: Those who come to console a mourner are not allowed to speak until the mourner begins talking first [just as Iyov’s friends did not speak until he himself spoke to which then a friend responded].
T’s Lesson: Many times one may feel uncomfortable and out of place at a Shivah call, not knowing what to do or say. However, as we learn from Iyov’s friends (who were not even Jewish), that there is comfort in just sitting with the mourner and commiserating by feeling his pain. We should not begin to speak until mourners do, and never say anything hurtful or unhelpful, G-d forbid.